Why I Should Be Head of Merchandising at Target Spent the last few days in and around Boston with my friend L to celebrate American Thanksgiving and get in a ton of shopping. No trip to America is complete without a trip to Target, the upscale-WalMart-without-the-mandatory-employee-drug-tests retail giant. With clothes by designer Issac Mizrahi and household items designed by Michael Graves, Target appeals to the side of me that likes to scour church sales for something really cool for very little money. I know that Target and I go well together because I've anticipated many of their merchandising decisions well before I actually saw them in the store. Proof 1: For the past three years, I have been looking for a fake silver Christmas tree. No one makes them anymore. I need one to go with my ultra-cool Christmas tree stand, which is basically a brushed steel drum with several coloured lights in it. The drum rotates. It begs for a silver tree. The one that I've been using for the past few Christmases is a cheap green one I spray painted silver. This year, Target finally had real silver Christmas trees. In two sizes. They were really cheap. I bought both sizes. Proof 2: Target has recently offered a line of furniture made from plywood. I have just completed making my own furniture from plywood. We did this unbeknowst to one another. Spooky. I'm not sure, but I think this is a sign that I'm on the cutting edge of retail kitsch.

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